Spitting Image

A secret cabal of celebrities plots to dominate the US government by running Sylvester Stallone as President.

Woody Allen writes more movies about life, Hoffman, De Niro and Pacino have an identity crisis, Spielberg struggles under the weight of all his money, and refusal to take him as a serious actor pushes Leonard Nimoy over the edge.

While Margaret Thatcher impersonates the Queen, can Joan collins really be in bed with John McEnroe? As Bob Dylan protests against the use of cheese, Mick Jagger gets in trouble whilst abusing other dairy products. Meanwhile, in 'The Presidents Brain Is Missing', President Reagan wakes up in bed with a stuffed monkey...

Thatcher is seranaded by her Cabinet in the back garden of Number 10 while Mary Whitehose strengthens her convictions about how awful Spitting Image really is. Dylan is still protesting - this time against pants - and Sir Robin Day may finally have met his match on this week's 'Question Time'

As a parasitic version of Janet Street-Porter speaks to you live and direct from Nancy Regan's navel, Jeremy Wilcox is in his back garden at No. 9 Downing Street, London, flirting with Prime Minsiter Margaret Thatcher over the hedge. Prince Charles pays a starnge visit to the Falklands while Lawson is interrogated by Thatcher and Norman Tebbit over the budget - with dire consequences!

While Ronald Reagan loses a debate to a cheese sandwich, Robert Maxwell ponders the content of tomorrow's newspapers. The Royal Family decide long and hard on a name for the new baby, but one of their number hides a dark secret...

Prince Williams devious machinations continue, while Barry Norman takes time out to interview Dustin Hoffman in his starring role as The Lettuce. The Cabinet struggle to find a response to the latest piece of news when they find all the best answers have already been used.

As Liz Taylor explodes, Donald Sinden tries his best to sell the viewing public a nice cup of Reptiles Bland Blend Coffee. Sir John Geilgud reads another excerpt from the Booker Prize winning 'The A Team' (in the original Latin).

While the Cabinet celebrates Michael Heseltine's resignation, Prince Philip wastes his time trying to teach his son how to play Colditz. Ronald Reagan's diary tells the inside story on the presidency, and celebrities band together for another charity songbecause they are scared of Bob Geldof.

Prince Andrew's in trouble wih his Pa for the size of his unmentionables. Terry Wogan chooses Sooty as his holiday replacement while Margaret Thatcher works on a new softer image. Derek Jameson gor-blimeys his way through another horrible programme.

Sir David Attenborough has a philosophical discussion with a suicidal seal. Leon Brittan discusses the possible repercussions of being outed as a mole and Brian Walden discovers that you can't put a better bit of Botha on your knife.

When a Cherubic urchin gets an unfortunate visitation from the Tooth Fairy, the BBC News gets a revamp with Marcel Marceau reporting live from Northern Ireland. A bunch of professional cockneys show off their new long-playing record and Jeffrey Archer appears on Mastermind - his special subject; Jeffrey Archer.

Points of View is taken to task for a continuity error made during the transmission of some hard-core porn, Neil Kinnock takes on a true Mission Impossible - turning the Labour Party into an electable force by 1992 - and Bros are shocked to find that they've just gone out of fashion.

Mrs. Thatcher confesses her true feeling to Ronald Reagan, whilst yet another ITV Telethon tries it's best but fails miserably. Alan Bennett attempts to get Richard Attenborough interested in his new play about an old lady from Huddersfield who can't open a packet of biscuits. Dickie's not sold on the idea.